LAZY SUNDAYS....

I just spent the entire morning lying in bed with my adorable puppy... until she decided she was going to pee all over my sheets. Now I'm up, I've got homework and laundry to do and I have to go for a run. I'm watching the Oscars with my roommate later... mmmmm Javier....

Tattoo tomorrow!!! YAY!!!

A Woman Needs a Man Like a Fish Needs a Bicycle...

I think I might have had a break through at therapy last night. My therapist thinks there are two things that are making me so unhappy: my mother and my job. I am working as a nanny to put myself through school AGAIN, and I am going to school to make my mom happy. The job isn't bad, it pays well and the kids love me but I am 26 years old and I need to have adult interaction in my life. Right now, I spend my entire day with a two year old and a three month old and I come home and take classes online. My social life is suffering, BIG TIME!!!!

 I am going back to school to become an elementary school teacher. I like kids, I'm good with them, but is that really what I am meant to do? School isn't such a bad thing, I can always do something with a masters in elementary education. I can start a theater and drama program for kids and I have always wanted to start a nonprofit organization that helps to keep the arts alive in public schools. So why am I so uncomfortable with the situation I'm in. 

One thing that does make me happy at the moment... my new tattoo. I'm getting it done this week (hopefully). It's going to be a fish riding a bicycle. It's a Florence Kennedy quote and a line from an old U2 song. It is totally representative of how I am feeling right now, like a fish out of water. 

Oh Therapy, Can You Please Fill the Void?

So, after I lost my job back in August I've been struggling to figure out what it is that I really want from life. I thought that I was going through the same shit that everyone in their mid twenties goes through... "Who am I? Why am I here? What does it all Mean?" I decided to see a therapist to try and sort it all out and get a little bit of career advice as well. No big deal, right? WRONG! The therapist did not have encouraging words for me. At the end of my first session she told me that I was in serious need of therapy, that I should be seeing a counselor twice a week and she even referred me to a psychiatrist to prescribe me  medication in order to speed up the process of my "treatment". 

So apparently I need to be "fixed". I didn't even know I was broken. Sure I was a little mixed up, but it's not like I was on the verge of suicide. I was simply trying to gain a little perspective. Now I am starting to feel even more confused than I did before. It's not a good feeling at all and it's costing me a fortune!

I'm not sure that I am going to continue with the "therapy" at the moment. I decided that since writing has always been one of my best outlets for venting my frustrations, I'd start a blog. No I am not a narcissist My life is actually quite boring and I don't expect anyone to care. I've created this blog for the sake of my own (in)sanity and my bank account as well. Anyways, I'm going to be late for my next therapy appointment...